Affirmations work for self-doubt

I tried pushing it, and then I had doubts

So, you know that my goal this year is to be able to run at 7.8 miles per hour for three minutes straight at 2.5 percent incline on the treadmill. I’ve been doing almost that speed but just for one minute alternating with walking at 4 mph for another minute. And the speed? Just one or two intervals at 7.5 during my workout time. The other day I decided to do 2 minutes straight at speed and incline. I could do it, right? After all, I’ve been doing this for some time. And I’ve been increasing speed and incline regularly. No problem, right? And then I started having doubts. Just one minute is hard. How much harder is 2? Could I do it? Was I crazy? But then I told myself that I could always back off the speed if I needed to. I can go as fast as I can go. But I can do it. This was a test of whether affirmations work for self-doubt.

The perfect pair

Affirmations and self-doubt are a match made in psychological heaven, as it turns out. The knowledge that I could back off the speed whenever I wanted helped me think that it was actually possible to maintain it. The fact that I was at an exciting part of the book I was listening to helped!

How affirmations work

Affirmations work for self-doubt

Angele Close, PhD, a licensed clinical psychologist, says that affirmations work by “shifting our mental attention towards our intentions.” And that “has the potential to help us steer away from negative thinking patterns and create a positive change in mood, mindset, and energy.” It’s natural to doubt ourselves. On that run, I was thinking that I couldn’t possibly maintain the speed for the duration. An affirmation turned it around and gave me the boost that I needed to try.

That positive change in my mindset gave me energy. I could keep on running, even though I was tired and sweaty. And that’s what we all need to keep us going, That boost of positive mental energy. It increases our resilience and our optimism, and makes for a great workout, too.

When should you use affirmations

Dr. Close says that affirmations are best used to evoke experiences. So, for me, I thought of how it feels for me to run. It’s not comfortable, and it’s not easy. So I thought about pushing that speed and maintaining it, feeling what I feel, and knowing that I would make it through. And I did. That affirmation helped me keep going. I didn’t quit, and I know that’s good for my own healthy aging.. 

Dr. Close also advises us beginners not to go crazy with too many affirmations. Our brain will be overwhelmed and the affirmations, positive though they may be, won’t do us any good. Keep it simple. If you’re troubled, though, try one. I speak from experience – affirmations work for self-doubt.

Is it possible to lose weight without drugs

Last week’s post defining fitness, struck a chord with many. But people ask if they can get fit while still overweight. And if so, is it possible to lose weight without drugs? I maintain that it’s not only possible, but many people are succeeding, even at our age. 

A word about weight-loss drugs

Many researchers, physicians and prescribers consider the newer weight-loss drugs long-term solutions. They see obesity as a chronic disease. Their patients will always have the disease because there’s no cure. The drugs address the symptoms, not the underlying cause. So people can, conceivably, stay on these drugs forever.

Do people have to stay on drugs forever?

Walking is a great way to introduce exercise.

But many people, including those over 50, choose another path. I did some looking around, and found out about a lady, let’s call her Angie, who’s been successful without drugs. “I’m 62. Over the last 2 years, I have lost 130 pounds by basically reducing portion sizes to ‘kid’s meal’ at a restaurant and taking my little black cat for walks around the trailer park. First time I’ve been less than 200 pounds at 5’7″ since I was 18.”

And another lady, let’s call her Patricia, who said, “I’m 5’7” and 55 yrs old and am in the process of losing 163 lbs. I have now lost 33 lbs -watching portions and stopping when I’m actually full…. Losing about 1-2 lbs a week (soooo slow but I will take it)….and have 130 lbs to go.”

So, eating right and exercise are the keys to getting fit. Even just taking walks around the trailer park counts as exercise – in a major way! And Angie’s cat is getting the benefits too. This is how you lose weight without drugs. Neither method is good or bad. One is not better than the other. But many people prefer not to take drugs unless it’s absolutely necessary.

A commitment

If you have a lot of weight to lose, the prospect of losing only 1-2 pounds a week is daunting. You see a future of unhappiness and dreary days with boring food. Food is a pleasure we all look forward to every day. We humans need to eat. And adding variety to our meals is one way to add happiness. There are a zillion healthy options when it comes to mealtime. If you’re bored with your usual diet, check out other countries’ cuisines.

That’s not to say that you have to deny yourself. In fact, you know that I’m a proponent of never saying no to a craving

There’s also a commitment to exercise. There’s nothing I’d like more than to be a sedentary hermit, but all the experts agree that movement is vital. If you’re like me, but have gone the sedentary hermit route for a while, I’ll bet you hurt when you do get up from your comfy armchair. Stairs are probably an issue, too. Get moving! It really does help. And it’s important for your healthy aging. Those experts have that title for a reason.

So, drugs are not required for weight loss. But a positive mindset is. We’ll talk about that next time.

What is Fitness?

Technically, it’s still the beginning of the year, so many of us are still in our goal-setting phase for the quarter or the year. I thought it was appropriate, since I call this site “Fitness Over 50,” to explore exactly what is fitness. What does fitness mean to us, people who are middle-aged or perhaps older.

I did a search and, not surprisingly, there are quite a few meanings for the word. Fitness, according to Cross Fit ”comes through molding men and women that are equal parts gymnast, Olympic weightlifter, and multi-modal sprinter.” Yikes! That definition seems a bit extreme for most of us, entering this stage of life. But if you aspire to these qualities, then definitely go for it.

Physical fitness, according to MIT Medical, “Physical fitness is to the human body what fine tuning is to an engine. It enables us to perform up to our potential. Fitness can be described as a condition that helps us look, feel and do our best.”  A definition like this is one I can get behind. Fitness “enables us to perform up to our potential,” so it’s different for everyone. Everyone has a different potential and, it can be argued, it’s something that we can grow and change as our lives change.

Fitness is personal

But the definition I relate to the most comes from Sharecare: Fitness is a very personal term!  Fitness is having a healthy mind, body, and spirit to allow you to maximize your potential and help others maximize their potential.  Your definition of fitness will be influenced by your interests, physical abilities, and goals.”

Fitness is mind, body and everything in between

Fitness is different for everyone

To me, fitness combines every aspect of your being. From what’s on the outside to physical organs on the inside, and even to your thoughts and beliefs. Fitness is the ability to live every day with joy and meaning. Those are very personal ideas too: how one person experiences joy can be very different from another. And the meaning of my day can be as simple as playing with my dogs or as deep as writing a (hopefully) well-thought article on fitness. 

So, “what is fitness?” is different for everyone, but I think there are some commonalities. Being fit is the ability to do the things you want to do when you want to do them. I exercise so that I have the independence and the mobility to do exactly that – what I want. I set goals to have a path forward. When I have a path forward, I can plan my days and be happy. I’m optimistic that I can achieve my goals, and that makes me even more resilient.

You decide what being fit is for you

Being fit may include looking and feeling good, but it’s much more than that. Everyone has their own definition of fitness, and you can use that definition to maintain your motivation. It’s what can get you up in the morning, ready to lace up your sneakers or dive into a meditation session. The fact that you are fit will help you get through tough times and look forward to the future. You know that even when things feel hard – like lifting a 30-pound weight – you can take a deep breath and do it. When you’re fit, you automatically do things for your healthy aging. It’s not even a conscious thing. When you’re fit, you move – and move forward.

Every step you take toward your goal proves that you’re amazing!

2025 is two weeks old. If you’re still working toward a goal you set, you’re on track to beat the rest of the world. People who make fitness resolutions at the start of a year usually fall off the wagon by the two-week mark. If you’re still sweating, you should feel really good about yourself! It’s not easy changing the way you live. At our age, we’ve spent quite a few decades practicing some bad habits. But now you’ve realized that you need to change something for your healthy aging. So, consider that every step you take toward your goal proves that you’re amazing! 

You can do hard things

every step you take toward your goal proves you're amazing

Every day that you change your clothes and lace up your sneakers or dive into that pool, you prove that you can do hard things. These days it’s easy to find many exercise programs online. The hard part is choosing one you like, is safe and effective, and is one you can stick with. Because that’s the key. Your consistency is the key to your success.

I’ve written about how to keep going toward your goal when you don’t feel like doing it. But actually starting a program is hard as well. To do something that you’ve never done before – start and continue with an exercise program – really proves that you’re amazing.

The Amazing Box

But those procrastination and hooky gremlins are out there. You know – the ones that tell you to scroll just a few minutes more. Or, it’s too cold to exercise. And the dog is sleeping on me – I can’t move! Those excuses? If you can bolster your resolve and keep that appointment with yourself, that definitely proves that you’re amazing. Your strength proves that you’re resilient. You make appointments and keep them – especially the ones with yourself. Because those are the really important ones.

Every accomplishment goes in your Amazing Box

A while ago I told you about the Amazing Box. A place where you write down all the things – even the smallest – you do that are amazing or bring you the slightest bit closer to your goal. It doesn’t have to be a physical box, although that would be fun, but it has to be a special place you can visit when you feel your motivation flagging. Just opening up your Amazing Box and reading a couple of entries gives you that pat on the back. That “oomph” to keep going. And reinforces your belief in yourself.

Goal setting to grow

Last week we focused on the Fitness Formula. The Fitness Formula is quite simple, and at its core involves only 2 requirements: eating right and exercising. But to actually achieve fitness, a crucial third element is needed, and that’s motivation. Because, while it might sound easy, the Fitness Formula is hard. And even for those lucky people who are already fit, staying that way takes work as well. But doing the same old, same old gets really boring after the first few days. So, to spice things up and keep your motivation at any stage of your fitness journey, why not use your goal setting to grow?

Envision what things might be like

A different way to look at your goals is to envision how you’d like things to be. If it’s the beginning of the year, what do you want December to look like for you? Obviously, you can do this exercise any time, but starting at the beginning of the year and looking at the end of it seems natural. 

Starting with your appearance, what size do you want to wear? How is your health? What does your kitchen look like – can you make healthy meals from the food that’s in your fridge and your cabinets? And what activities are you involved in? Take the opportunity to dream a little big. Get a little uncomfortable. Use your goal setting to grow. When you take risks, there’s so much more opportunity to grow than if you play it safe.

With challenges, there’s growth

This is the exciting part. The year is your oyster, so to speak, and it’s up to you to make a statement for it. You don’t want to set easy goals, because there’s no challenge there, and probably little if any personal growth. Growth leads to resilience which leads to optimism and, ultimately, your healthy aging. And we all want to be our best, healthiest selves as we get older. As we learn more and do more, we gain self-confidence and resolve. We know that anything’s possible. 

A challenging, but silly, personal example

This was a tough challenge

Let’s take a silly example. In an effort to improve my balance, over and above doing the practical, proven exercises recommended every week in the Balance for Fitness Balance for Life Group (private, on Facebook), I wanted to test myself with the one-arm, one-leg plank pose in an effort to be ready to join the circus if the opportunity presents itself. (Told you it was silly.) I figured, what could be so hard? Tried it, and landed on my face. Apparently not so simple. After weeks of modifying on one knee or one arm, strengthening my core and getting used to what the pose felt like, I tried it again for a second. And landed on my face. But ultimately I was successful. So, how did I grow in this endeavor? I learned that I’m persistent and I can learn. There’s nothing I can’t do if I can figure out a way to modify and figure out the steps that will ultimately achieve my goal.

Goal setting to grow

So, what do you want to achieve by the end of the year? Lose 10 pounds? Super. Cut out sugar from your diet? Excellent. You’ll figure out healthier, tasty alternatives. Be in shape to hike through Europe even if you’ve never laced up a pair of hiking boots? Wonderful. Set a deadline, figure out your steps toward the goal, and get ready to grow. 

The Fitness Formula

The Fitness Formula is simple. Eat well and exercise. That’s it. If you eat nutritious food that gives you the calories, nutrients, vitamins and minerals you need, and if you exercise at an intense level for 30 minutes 4 times a week, you’ll become fit. That sounds very easy, doesn’t it? But it’s hard to put into practice.

Most fitness resolutions fail

Many people state as their New Year’s Resolution, “I’m going to get fit in the New Year!” And that’s an awesome goal. But as many others know, after the first few weeks of excitement of going to a new gym and trying out low-fat and low-calorie recipes, it’s also easy to let that resolution fall by the wayside. In fact, according to Loyola Medicine, almost a quarter of people quit their resolutions the first week. Half in the first month, and only 9% actually achieve their goal. 

What goes wrong?

There has to be something that people are missing in the formula then, to fail at such a huge rate. The formula seems to be very simple. Eat right and exercise. So, what goes wrong? 

Eating right is hard

As I see it, as folks over 50, we’re tired. I’m tired all the time. And there are so many demands on our time. Eating right takes even more time. We have to plan meals that are nutritious and taste good – and if there’s someone else’s tastes and requirements to take into consideration, that takes even more time for planning. Then we have to shop and prepare the meals. Which means that we’re even more tired. And hopefully there’s someone else who can deal with the clean-up. No doubt about it – eating right is hard.

Exercise is hard too

Exercise is hard if you're not motivated,

And as people over 50, we know that exercise is important to our healthy aging. The CDC has recommended a level of exercise which seems appropriate for those who have been doing it a while. But the exercise part should be as easy as the concept of eating right – after all, it’s just a couple of hours a week, right? But if we’re not enjoying it, we’re not doing it. And lots of gym memberships go unused because the members aren’t enjoying it.

So, what’s missing?

If you’re not doing hard things for a really good reason, you’re not going to keep doing them. Eating right is hard. It’s much simpler to stop at a drive-through on your way home than to plan and prepare a hearty nutritious meal. It’s a whole lot easier to binge your favorite Netflix series than change clothes and sweat at the gym. 

Motivation is the missing piece to the Fitness Formula

Your really good reason is the key that keeps you moving toward your goal of fitness. If you want to enjoy that hiking trip through Europe in a few months, that’s a good reason to stay with your eating and exercise plan. If your grandkids are at a fun age and you don’t want to miss the opportunities of running around the yard and playing with them, that’s another good reason to eat right and exercise. And if you want to be able to walk and gossip with your friends, that’s also motivation to stick with your resolution.

The Fitness Formula is easy, but it has three parts, not two. Yes, eating right and exercise are crucial, but so is your motivation. Your motivation helps you plan all those meals and sustains you through the tough workouts. 

Create an exercise habit

It sounds kind of boring, doesn’t it – create an exercise habit. Yet nothing could be further from the truth. If exercise is a habit for you, then you don’t have to feel like you’re girding yourself for battle a few times a week when you think about working out. You don’t have to find time on your calendar for exercise because it’s already scheduled. And you’re getting all the benefits of exercise without even thinking about it. Your heart is getting stronger, your balance is improving, your sleep has never been better and your memory is as sharp as it ever was.

Be active and fit to do all the other stuff

Exercise is a habit for me, and has been for many years. I realized a long time ago that the only way I was going to be able to do the things I wanted to do with my life, and eat all the chocolate I wanted, was if I was active and fit. And all the studies say exercise is crucial for healthy aging. So, how did I create an exercise habit?

How to create an exercise habit

First, you have to understand that there’s nothing I enjoy more than curling up with a good book. For hours. I love to stay home and hibernate. I was never an athletic person, and when I was a kid, I skipped gym class more than a few times. As an adult, though, I realized that no one else was responsible for my well-being, so I’d best look out for it.

Create an exercise habit to reap all the benefits.

I found a workout program I didn’t mind (too much). I could see myself doing it a few times a week, and actually put it on my calendar. Back then all the calendars were paper, so I used ink! No erasing. And I followed through on my commitment. In order for this to work, I had to commit to the plan. It doesn’t do anyone any good to create goals and then not do the work. That’s why creating intermediate steps toward a goal is so important. When you reach those mid-goals, you have things to celebrate. When you can actually see and taste the mid-goals you set, even if you can’t see your end goal, you have that positive mindset that’s so important to achieving your goals.

It’s not set in stone

And don’t be afraid to change your exercise program. If you find that you really can’t tolerate the instructor or the moves are killing your knees, find something else! You should never be locked into a program you don’t care for. By the same token, if you outgrow the program that you started with, find a more challenging one.

It takes about a month to create a habit, so you’re in it for the long haul. When you create an exercise habit, you’re the one who will reap all the benefits.

Choose the right goal

Much of what I write is about fitness and creating goals to achieve what you want for your fitness. But I haven’t written about how to go about how to choose the right goal. I tell you to choose goals that are a stretch but achievable, that are quantifiable, and that have a deadline. And I suggest that you break your big goals down into intermediate goals that are even more achievable in the short term.

But how do you choose the right goal for you?

First, think about what you want in life and in your fitness. I’ve told you that one of my goals is to run 7.8 miles per hour for a sustained three minutes at a 2.5 percent incline on the treadmill. Some of you may laugh at that because you can do that in your sleep. Others may think that it’s out of reach. And still others may question my sanity. For me, I believe that this goal is achievable with some work.

What do you want to do?

User comments

Your fitness goal is not mine. You may want to be able to run around your yard with the grandkids, or hike in Europe, or even walk in the mall with friends. So, choose the right goal for you. What will it take for you to have the endurance to run around with the grandkids and then go inside and cook a delicious dinner? Some questions you might ask yourself are: Can you walk for an extended period now? Can you walk unassisted? How quickly can you walk? Are you able to run on grass? Can you stop short and turn quickly? Once you assess your current abilities, these might be some intermediate goals to set for yourself. If you see obstacles in the way of achieving a goal like this, like achy knees and hips, find out what it might take to reduce or eliminate that pain.

Here’s the plan:

Or what kind of training will you need to hike in Europe? Think about the future you envision for yourself and choose the right goal for you. Then figure out exactly what it will take to achieve it. Adrienne Tierney, instructor and research advisor for Harvard Extension School’s psychology master’s program, agrees that your goal needs to be concrete, and researching what it will take to achieve it are key. Creating the right goal for you enables your resilience and your healthy aging. You’re seeing the future, and it’s rosy. You have an optimistic mindset. Then creating the intermediate steps helps your time management – because you schedule the work you’ll need to do to achieve them. Your Get It Done Guide will help you choose the right goals for you and identify the steps you’ll need to take to get there.

And choosing the right goals for you will make it so much more likely that you’ll work to see them happen.

When your state of mind makes it impossible to get stuff done

Some days, no matter what you do, you still feel like it’s impossible to get stuff done. I get it. You used to feel like you were invincible. And you felt like your resilience knew no bounds. But some days, when the world beats at you from every direction, you feel like you just want to curl into a little ball and hibernate for the foreseeable future. But even though it feels like it’s impossible, there’s still stuff that needs to get done. 

So, how do you go about doing it?

When not even looking at your Get Stuff Done Funtime Menu helps you get past the whirlwind in your brain, how can you even start?

First, center yourself. If my brain is whirling when I have to get stuff done, I know it’s just a waste of time. I can’t help my brain from whirling, but I can shift gears and give it a mental shove to focus on something else. Psychologist Lauren Kerwin, PhD, recommends practicing mindfulness for one minute every day on each of your senses:

Focus on something you see as part of your mindfulness exercise - here, my dog.

One minute on something you can see: your dog, a bird outside the window, the color of your floor tiles.
Something you can touch: a blanket, the water running through your fingers.
Then on something you can smell: tea, essential oil, laundry detergent on your shirt.
And something you can hear: the hum of the air conditioner, a car driving by.
Finally something you can taste: toothpaste, food you’re eating.

This practice grounds you in the physical world and helps your brain move past the tornado.

But how can you get stuff done even after you’re grounded?

Chances are, even after you’ve done the exercises to ground yourself, you’re still feeling pretty shaky. I know I feel vulnerable after this, and not ready to start to get stuff done. When you’re feeling less like there’s a tornado in your head, but it’s still impossible to get stuff done, how do you even start?

Just start

Do something. Take one step. Make it a small step. A very tiny step. And then another. Then another. The idea here is to reach a point where you can take action. Because starting small is still starting. If you can only do five minutes of work – whatever the work may be, it’s still five minutes you couldn’t have done before. It’s a start. 

And tomorrow you can do more. You’ve proven your resilience before.

5 Ways to Create a Positive Mindset

It’s tough these days. The world seems to be getting smaller and more nervous all at the same time. With instant access to so many media sources, it’s easy to become overwhelmed. And this week has brought it all to the fore. My brain has been churning so much that I’ve had to completely check out a few times to not break down completely. And checking out – turning everything off – is one way to create a positive mindset (see below). 

One way to create a positive mindset is exercise.

Why does a positive mindset matter? If you believe that things are dark, you’ll never see the light again, and you’ll never be able to do anything about it, then you won’t. You’ll be stuck in that dark place because you believe it. On the other hand, if you completely believe that something is possible, you’ll make it happen. An article in the Journal of Neurochemistry indicates that our brains adapt to changes in its environment. It’s not as simple as affirming that everything is okay, but our brains are quite malleable. And we can make that positive change happen. You’ll be happier, more productive and more resilient. Here are some ways to create a positive mindset and let ourselves get things done.

Stop doomscrolling

I found myself getting more and more depressed with each post I read the other day. I had to consciously turn my phone off to get out of that spiral. So, when things get to be too much, just turn your screens off. It can be for five minutes or five hours. Take the time you need.

Sleep

Make sure you get enough sleep. Being tired affects your mood, your productivity and your health. Stick to a consistent sleep routine. It helps.

Get one thing done

Set your priorities for the day, making sure that you choose a few intermediate steps toward your goals. You’ve developed these in the worksheet included in the Get It Done Guide. And get one thing done. Just one little thing checked off can really improve your mood. It’s so satisfying.

Exercise

I’ve said it before – those endorphins from intense exercise are real. I feel a bazillion times better after a workout. After a tough exercise session, I’m a much nicer person.

Meditate

It’s not woowoo. It really does help to center you and help your mind stop churning. A short guided meditation (download one for under a dollar here) can clear your brain and help you become more productive.

Use any or all of these techniques to create a positive mindset. They work for me.