Reach your biggest goals one step at a time

Last time we talked about stuff you had to get done, no matter what. For those tasks, you just have to buckle down and do it. But what about your big goals. How can you achieve the things that there’s no deadline for, or that you’d really like to have happen but hadn’t started yet? It can seem overwhelming to have pie-in-the-sky goals, but they’re really necessary. And you can reach your biggest goals one step at a time.

We all want big things, and we usually want them as fast as possible. But the best, most life-changing goals take time. We have to plan the steps that it takes to get to the ultimate goal. Why not just dive in? Because for many goals, we’ll never get there. And for the goals that we do reach, they may be set too low and there may be further achievements that we’d miss out on.

Take the time to plan

Three-time Olympic gold medalist Gabby Douglas spent eight years away from her sport. But now she’s back in training. In fact, she recently qualified for the U.S. Championships with hopes of making it to the Paris games this year. She stepped away after the Rio games because the training, then the Games themselves, took so much out of her. She said, I went through hell x2 and i lost my joy, i lost my passion, my fire, my love, and then myself.”

So, then what happened? How did Douglas find her passion in gymnastics again? She said that she did a lot of reflecting and journaling. Then when she decided to go back to training she just took a deep breath and stepped into the gym. “Remember, you don’t have to get it all done in one day. Take baby steps — I definitely did.”

One step at a time

And that’s good advice for anyone with a big goal. Douglas knew what it took to achieve success. And she knew that it was a lot. So she took it slow. One step at a time. That’s what we all should do when faced with a really big goal. For me, to reach the goal of a side plank with my leg raised, I modified the move, got stronger, and finally was able to do the full pose. Planning for one step at a time keeps you motivated to continue.

Break it down

Consider that goal, and everything that it will take to achieve it. Then think about the logical steps to take to get there. All of them. Write it down. And then plan – concisely, every step, every milestone, with deadlines. Use your “Get It Done” Guide to help you plan! Then do it. And when you reach a milestone, celebrate! That’s what keeps you motivated to continue toward that big goal.

That’s what Olympic champions do.

Just buckle down and do it

I’ve been writing about motivation lately. How you can motivate yourself to do things you don’t want to do with “little treats” (which works really well!), and about different kinds of motivation that have been identified. And that the motivation that’s inside you is more compelling than outside factors that may motivate you. But sometimes you have to just buckle down and do it. Whatever “it” is. 

Procrastination only goes so far

Sometimes it’s hard. You don’t want to do it. You procrastinate for as long as you think you can. But then the time comes and a deadline nears. And you have to just buckle down and do it.

Let’s say you have company coming for dinner tomorrow. And there’s evidence of dog paws on the living room couch. And the rugs need to be vacuumed. You hate to dust, so there could be spots that you missed last time. But you’re having people over tomorrow. That doesn’t leave much time to get it all done. You have your menu planned, you’ve shopped and listed all the cooking steps so dinner gets on the table. But there are people coming tomorrow and you don’t want them to think you live in a pigsty. 

Just buckle down and do it

This is where the rubber meets the road. Your motivation is clear. You know what needs to be done. So you get the spot cleaner out. You put your earphones in and get to work with the furniture polish. Plug the vacuum in and do it.

Chances are your onerous housekeeping chores didn’t take as long as you thought they would. Sometimes it’s just a matter of recognizing the task and doing it. 

It takes all kinds

Why do we procrastinate doing certain tasks? Everyone has different likes and dislikes. There’s nothing that’s more satisfying to me than adding a column of numbers. My sister thinks that’s crazy. I let piles on my desk grow until I have to find something. Other people think that’s nuts too. And that’s the way of the world. There are tasks that you love doing, I’m sure, that I dislike. But sometimes I have to just buckle down and do it. And sometimes that’s motivation enough.

Think of it as your job

When we have tasks that we need to accomplish, sometimes, too, it’s helpful to think of those tasks as our job. When I was working in the corporate world, there were plenty of aspects to the job that I didn’t care for. But I did them. For our “home tasks,” though, we have to change our mindset to see tasks as our job. Instead of a paycheck, though, we’ll get the satisfaction of not having to face that task again – at least for a while.

The example here is a short-term one. When you’re facing a task that has more long-term consequences, though, a different mindset is needed. And I’ll look at that next time.

People in recovery turn to fitness

Why people who are recovering turn to exercise for motivation

First off, this is a no-judgment zone. People who are recovering need our support, not our opinions. It’s all too easy to try substances that your friends try, then when it’s too late, discover that it’s nowhere near as easy to stop that substance. People who are recovering absolutely require other outlets for their interests. They need all the tools that the world can give them for that recovery. I learned that people in recovery turn to fitness which can provide the distraction and motivation they need.

Fitness is a community

Movement provides “transformational” mental and physical health benefits, according to Scott Strode, founder of a national “sober active community.” Fitness also brings people who are different in many other ways, together.

Physical and mental benefits

We know that exercise provides benefits from improved health, to better cognition, to more quality sleep. It also improves mood and reduces the risk of depression. But according to a 2023 study, people who jogged and did weight training, who were also being treated for addiction, were more likely to reduce their substance use than those who were not active.

From the results of this study, there were non-quantitative physical, emotional and brain-based benefits that led to positive change. We’ve seen before that exercise can produce that “runner’s high,” even though we’re not running. Exercise encourages the growth of brain cells, andl that leads to the release of dopamine. That mood boost is yet another reason for why people in recovery turn to fitness.

Fitness provides more positive outlets

Strode says that “movement and exercise helped him redirect subconscious neural pathways related to early childhood trauma at the root of his substance use.” Other studies have shown that exercise leads to an increase in the brain’s neuroplasticity, or the brain’s way of reorganizing thought patterns. This can help someone who’s recovering to find other, more positive, outlets.

And fitness provides routine

A fitness routine can also help someone who’s recovering find structure and grounding. We’ve talked about how to start (and continue) a fitness routine, to form the healthy habit of exercise at any age. It’s another good reason why people in recovery turn to fitness.

The Gut-Brain Connection

It’s all connected. I’ve mentioned many times that when we exercise our brain gets the benefits as well as our body. Exercise promotes improved cognition, better memory and more quality sleep. But something that I hadn’t considered until recently is that there’s a gut-brain connection too. 

I no longer have a cast iron stomach

Up until recently I had been blessed with a cast iron stomach. I could eat anything with no repercussions. And then out of the blue the family irritable bowel came calling. Not to disgust you with detailed descriptions, suffice to say that it’s not fun having a cranky gut. 

A study correlates gut and brain health

Then I read an article about a study performed by Harvard Medical School researchers that seems to correlate gut and brain health. Many people supplement their diets with probiotic foods, seeking to boost mental health. The study indicates that, just as your gut health influences your brain, your brain activity can have a positive impact on your gut health. Biochemical signals run from your gut to your brain as well as the other way.

“The mechanisms in the gut include immune system activation, alterations in the gut’s structure, and the resultant inflammation, which can impact the brain’s structure and function, ultimately affecting our behavior and emotions.” So, your gut really does affect your feelings and how you react in your normal, everyday life.

Can meditation affect the gut-brain connection?

meditation for a clear mind and sanity

The study, in particular, looked at the effects of meditation on gut health. It’s been known that meditation leads to physiological changes, such as reduced heart rate and lowered blood pressure. These in turn lead to reduced stress and overall well-being. This can also lead to more happiness and resilience as we age.

It’s known that stress can lead to “gut aggravation.” So, how would meditation alleviate this dysfunction? Would meditation lead to a calmer gut as well as a calmer brain? Would the gut-brain connection hold for this application?

The answer is a resounding “Yes.” After an 8-day meditation practice, the study found that participants exhibited increased levels of a compound known for its anti-inflammatory, analgesic, and vascular relaxation properties. It also found a decrease in a substance linked to atherosclerosis risk.
I’ve found that a daily meditation practice definitely helps my anxiety. Just a couple of minutes in a Guided Meditation helps. I’ll have to try and go deeper and see if my digestive problems can be alleviated!

An easy fix for weight loss?

Is this the easy fix everyone’s been waiting for?

I was a fat kid. I wrote that for my “About” page for this blog lots of years ago. Back when I was that fat kid, I wanted that easy fix for weight loss, that pill to swallow that would make me skinny. I went on diet after diet, trying to lose weight the easy way, by cutting out way too much food. But that’s what we did back then. When I was in high school I was finally sick and tired of being bullied. I wanted to get into the exclusive dance club. So I did it the hard way. I lost weight by watching everything that went into my mouth and by jumping rope for hours on end on the cement slab behind the house. The weight came off and stayed off all these years later.

Everyone’s on Ozempic

I had a dentist appointment last week, and she asked if I was on any medication, one of the standard questions. I gave my standard answer, “No.” And she said that many of her patients are on Ozempic to lose weight. People seem to think it’s the easy fix for weight loss that I wanted when I was younger.

Would I take it?

And that got me thinking. Would I take it now to lose weight? I don’t know for sure, but I’d like to think my answer would be, “No.” Ozempic is not a drug that’s listed for weight loss. It’s a drug for Type 2 Diabetes. Long-term effects haven’t been studied in otherwise healthy people who take it to lose weight. So, what could it be doing to healthy people’s systems? Rhetorical question, there. And when you stop taking the drug, many people gain the weight back, as with any weight-loss drug.

This writer won’t

I read an article by a writer who’s struggled with their weight their whole life. He’s not at his “ideal” weight, but he’s not going to be taking Ozempic any time soon either. It’s not because it’s a drug, or could be detrimental to his health. He refuses to conform to what society accepts. Good for him!

The right way to breathe

Breathing is something we take for granted, every minute of every day. We only think about it when it becomes hard – for example, if we’re ill. (Like during my cold last week.) And we breathe harder during certain activities, when we exert ourselves running up the stairs, for instance. And we still don’t think about it. That’s pretty amazing, if you ask me. But, is there a right way to breathe?

Air is a life-giving resource that we don’t even have to think about receiving. During our normal, every-day, tasks oxygen comes in and carbon dioxide goes out and we don’t have to do a thing. But when we exercise, we should be conscious of our breath to maximize the benefits we want to receive. When our lungs are working properly, our performance is optimized and we can achieve the other benefits that exercise gives us. So, what’s the right way to breathe during exercise to get the most out of it?

What happens when you breathe?

When you breathe, air travels through lots of tubes and byways on its way to your lungs. In your lungs, the air ends up in little sacs called “alveoli.” Each alveolus is surrounded by tiny little capillaries which drop off carbon dioxide and pick up oxygen and take it through your bloodstream. The primary purpose for breathing is actually to get rid of carbon dioxide rather than to get oxygen.

When you exercise, levels of carbon dioxide increase in your bloodstream, leading to the need to breathe faster to get rid of the excess. Exercise can increase respiratory efficiency but it doesn’t actually lead to increased lung capacity.

When you breathe shallowly, this can lead to additional stress. If you pay attention to your breathing and notice that you’re just using the upper part of your chest, this is shallow breathing. You’re not getting the oxygen you need, and you’re also not getting rid of enough carbon dioxide, contributing to a panic mode. That’s why people say to “breathe deeply” to help you calm yourself. Change your mindset just a little to breathe from your diaphragm and you’ll be calmer and get more out of your workout.

Diaphragmatic breathing

The best way to feel what you’re supposed to be doing is if you try this lying down (no pillow). Breathe in through your nose and feel your lower ribs rise (put your hands there to feel it more). Breathe out through your mouth and feel your lower ribs fall. Using the diaphragmatic breathing technique during exercise, exhale for the exertion and inhale on relaxation.

When you run

My breathing always increases when I run, and sometimes I find myself breathing through my mouth only. Experts indicate that doesn’t really matter – focus on the thing that makes running easier and more effortless. Some experts recommend varying the number of steps you take during inhalation and exhalation so that you’re not always on the same foot. Keep in mind that there’s really no one right way to breathe during exercise. Just be sure to breathe and not hold your breath. Again, focus on the thing that makes your exercise more effortless, and your breathing will follow.

Exercise with a cold?

I had a head cold this week. It was not COVID – I tested – thank goodness(!), so I didn’t have to miss my classes. I did wear a mask while close to people, but I wondered if I should work out. Should I exercise with a cold? The first couple of days I felt completely miserable and didn’t even consider changing into exercise gear. But after that, would I just be using my cold as an excuse to be lazy?

Above or below the neck?

The Mayo Clinic says that it’s perfectly fine to exercise as long as your symptoms are all above the neck and you don’t have a fever. Provided that your symptoms just include things like a runny nose, nasal congestion, sneezing and a minor sore throat, you should be fine if you exercise with a cold. Note how all these symptoms are “above the neck.” That’s what a head cold is about – and it’s not really a big deal. Sure, it’s uncomfortable and sometimes downright messy. But if you feel like exercising with a head cold, that’s fine.

On the other hand, if you have more than a head cold – if your symptoms are in your chest and lungs, or if you have a hacking cough, then it might be better if you wait to exercise until you’re better. Also, the Mayo Clinic suggests that if you have a fever, fatigue or muscle aches, wait. You don’t want to jeopardize your health even further. And if you have COVID, isolate yourself. If you want to exercise, don’t do it around other people. Be considerate. I even put a mask on at home while my sister and I did the dogs’ nails. It’s the right thing to do.

It’s okay to take time off

Definitely exercise if you're up to it, and your cold symptoms are above the neck.

Earlier, I mentioned that the first couple of days with a cold I didn’t exercise. I just felt too lousy. And even though sometimes if you exercise with a cold, it can actually open your nasal passages and temporarily relieve congestion, you certainly don’t have to. I’ve mentioned that it’s okay to take a day or two off from exercising without affecting your performance. But you should resume your normal activities when you can. For me, that alleviates my guilt, and I know I won’t be too sore the day after I exercise. 

The question is very personal: “Should I exercise with a cold?” For me, the answer is a practical, “If you’re up to it.” If it really is just a head cold, I won’t have too many days off and I’ll still be able to do the things I want to do.

A strong core eases back pain

Having back pain is the worst. You can’t do anything when your lower back hurts. Upper back pain is bad, too, but movement is usually at least possible. When your lower back hurts, you can’t walk comfortably. Forget about standing up when you’re sitting. And when you’re standing you can’t sit back down. And leaning over or bending is impossible. I speak from experience. Up until a few years ago I had sciatica pain that was unbearable for weeks at a time. The sciatica pain blended with the hip bursitis pain on occasion to create spasms of pain and breathlessness. I don’t like to think about that time. Then I read some studies that led me to work on my core. These studies indicated that having a strong core eases back pain. And in some cases prevents it entirely. Less pain means we can be happier every day.

Physical therapists agree

I still get newsletters from Athletico, where I did physical therapy for my knee a number of years ago. The latest newsletter (February 2024) highlights the correlation between a strong core and lessening back pain, in fact. “The goal of core stabilization exercises is to improve your abdominal strength and increase the stability in your lower back or lumbar spine, which can help alleviate aches and pains you’re currently experiencing.” So the key to easing back pain is not pain medication or even rest, it’s simple core exercises. This is great news for our healthy aging regimen.

The simplest core stabilization exercise

Renegade row - a great core stabilization exercise.

A simple core stabilization exercise is the plank, done on your forearms or the palms of your hands and your toes. Look straight ahead, tighten your core and keep your back in line. Don’t sink down or have a rounded back. If even a forearm plank is difficult for you, try an incline plank with your hands on a table, your kitchen counter or even a wall. As you get stronger, you can go lower. And you can add variations, like the “Renegade Row,” which challenges your core even more.

Other good core stabilization exercises include “Dead Bug,” which I talked about just a couple of weeks ago, and a simple pelvic tilt.

My goal, when I started working on my core, certainly was not to get a “six-pack.” I’ll be happy if no one else ever sees my abs. They’re strong and my back doesn’t hurt, and that’s all that matters to me. A strong core eases back pain for life. It doesn’t take long, if you’re consistent, and it’s certainly worth the few minutes to do the exercises most days.

Push-ups Work Everything

I’m really bad at push-ups. There. I said it. I’m weak, my elbows hurt when I try to go deep into a push-up, and I’m really bad at them. But I keep trying. Because I know that push-ups work everything. Experts not only recommend 150 minutes of aerobic activity a week, but also 2 days of strength training.

Strength training helps build muscle and also bones. We smallish women over a certain age can become fragile over time, and must do what we can to stay strong and vital, crucial for our healthy aging. Being strong means that we’ll be more resilient, too, able to face whatever life throws at us. And there’s nothing that builds and tests your strength more than push-ups.

Amber Harris, a certified strength coach, notes that including push-ups in our workouts helps us increase strength and muscle mass which we lose at a rate of 3 – 8 percent every decade over age 30. Push-ups also help us lift and push things, like boxes and doors. And, by working the core, push-ups also help us maintain good posture. But they’re hard.

Doesn’t something else work?

If you’re like me and don’t like to do push-ups, you’re thinking, can’t I do something else? And the answer is, of course. There are loads of exercises that build strength in your arms, your shoulders, your back, your core and your legs. Just not all at once. Push-ups work everything all at once, so it’s a really efficient exercise. Talk about multi-tasking. A few push-ups, even modified ones, pack more of a punch than an equal number of biceps curls, for example.

But I can’t do full push-ups

Me neither. Not many, anyway. Full push-ups, the ones where you’re on your toes, bending your elbows so your chest brushes the floor, are ridiculously hard. I can do maybe four of them. I know that if my goal is to do 25 full push-ups at some point, then I have to keep trying. For the rest, I modify.

Bianca Vesco, a NASM-certified personal trainer and fitness instructor, advocates modifying push-ups to meet you where you are so that you can build on them. You can start by doing standing push-ups, hands on the wall. Then progress to lower inclines, like your kitchen counter, a table, an ottoman, a step stool and then finally a full push-up on the floor. This progression gets steadily harder, but as you make your way through, your body will get stronger and you’ll succeed. For all of the modifications, though, remember to keep your neck straight, your core tight, your butt tucked and your back straight. Another progression, when you’re getting to the really hard ones, is to lower your body in the modified position, then when you’re as low as you can get, put your knees on the floor and reset to the starting position. This adjustment helps build the muscles you’ll need for the full push-up.

No matter where you are in your fitness journey, push-ups will help you build the strength you need. Because push-ups work everything.

Instead of punching something, do this instead

Mondays for me are frequently busy, tending to orders, customer requests, a too-full inbox and dogs zooming around like crazy things. This last Monday was all that and more. Not only were there customer requests, there were also customer complaints, website links not working, and a learning curve on a new mailing program that had me stymied. To say it was frustrating is an understatement. It’s impossible to be productive when we’re under major stress, and we know that stress can compromise our immune system. So, instead of punching something to release my frustration, I took a walk.

Instead of punching something, get physical

Use exercise to release stress instead of punching something

Releasing energy with physical activity is a great way to deal with frustration. I didn’t have time for an intense workout, but I could clear my head with a walk around the block. It was not a long walk, as the temperature was well below freezing and somewhat icy, and even bundled up it was still chilly. So my walk didn’t last long, but I burned a few calories and released some frustration. When I returned to my desk, my head was clearer and I was able to solve a couple of problems.

Exercise helps you handle other stress better

In fact, it’s been found that exercise helps to prevent anger. In a study done a few years ago, people who exercised were “less prone to anger and aggressive tendencies.” One theory as to why this may occur is that while we exercise, we put our bodies under prolonged beneficial stress. After exercise, our bodies are more able to handle other stresses.

Another possibility is that when you’re exercising, you’re putting the stressor on a back burner. You’re not thinking about the thing that got you angry in the first place, and stepping away for a while can help you put it in better perspective. So instead of punching something, you’re stepping away from it.

Replace stress with calm

And Harvard Health Publishing advocates certain autoregulating exercise techniques to help “replace the spiral of stress with a cycle of repose.” These techniques include breathing exercises which are similar to forms of meditation. Practicing progressive muscular relaxation  (tightening and releasing sequential muscle groups) works too, but takes longer to learn.

So instead of punching something when you’re angry or frustrated, try one of these techniques. You may be happier afterward, and your family definitely will be.