Not wanting to exercise is normal

It’s really not you – not wanting to exercise is normal.

It turns out that not wanting to exercise is normal. It turns out that as we get older, lots of systems in our body decline. You knew that – eyesight, hearing, cognition, memory. And we don’t want to exercise. That’s because of declining systems in our brain. Namely, our dopamine synthesis and dopamine receptors. That means that cognitive control, emotion and mood, motor function, positive reward, and motivation are also naturally declining. That means our natural enjoyment of life, our happiness and our motivation to exercise really does decrease as we get older.

It’s just not the same as before

So it is normal that we don’t feel like doing anything but mindlessly binge a series on Netflix. Or that we lack ambition to do anything but sit around. A recent article in Psychology Today notes that since our dopamine levels decline, we don’t get the satisfaction out of doing anything like we did in years past.

That’s depressing. I get that we all may not care that not wanting to exercise is normal, but how about the enjoyment that we get from other activities? I certainly want to experience the happiness of a good meal with friends or the enjoyment of reading a good book or listening to an amazing musical performance.

So how can we get back to feeling all these things?

First off, know that what helps one person feel things or become  motivated may not work for another. We all feel things differently – we’re not wired the same. 

Future to present – focus on the now

Find the joy in the little things if you prefer toexercise alone.

In looking at what made older people happy, one theory suggests that people’s motivation shifts from considering the future to being anchored in the present. And for motivation to exercise, older people are more likely to join a group to exercise rather than doing it alone. I guess I’m the weirdo here (preferring my solo exercise). So focusing on relationships can help you get fit as well as make you happy. Be with people you enjoy spending time with and encourage them to join you in exercise. It will help your body, your mind, your resilience and your healthy aging.

For those of us who prefer to go it alone, then continue to make exercise a habit. And find the joy in the little things – one more push-up. One more tenth of a mile. I listened to a great book while running.

We can boost our motivation to exercise

No wonder we don’t feel like exercising! We’ve been missing a vital piece of the puzzle.  You know how frustrated you get when you’re putting together a jigsaw puzzle and there’s a piece missing? Either you dropped it on the floor sometime or it was never in the box to start with. That’s what has been happening with our exercise. Here’s the missing piece to boost our motivation to exercise!

Add this to your motivation toolbox

Yes. Even after all these years, I need to (figuratively) give myself a kick in the behind to get up and exercise. I don’t enjoy it, I never have. But it’s a habit now, and you know if you ignore your good habits the thought just hangs over you like a cloud the rest of the day until you do it. Do you enjoy exercising? Didn’t think so. That’s why it’s so hard to get motivated. But what if you learned of a new element that, when you add it to your motivation toolbox, it fires you up and gets you moving?

It works with your step tracker

Many people already use a device to track their steps. I talked about this a few weeks ago – it’s fun to get that affirmation when you reach your step goal every day. And that’s great as far as it goes. 

Add mindfulness training to a step tracker to boost motivation to exercise.

We already know about the benefits of exercise. How it boosts our cognition, improves our strength, helps our sleep, and helps us to lose weight. Exercise helps us become more optimistic and resilient, and certainly encourages our healthy aging. But knowing about those benefits doesn’t get us to the gym or pushing “Play” on exercise videos at home. But the addition of a mindfulness app can help us go the rest of the way – beyond tracking our steps. When we’re aware of our body and how it moves, we’re more likely to add the strength elements and additional cardio conditioning we need. 

Add mindfulness training

According to a study published in the journal Mental Health and Physical Activity, researchers from the University of Bath discovered that the combination of step tracking with mindfulness training boosted participants’ motivation to continue exercising. And participants also exercised for a longer period of time every week that they used that combination.

So, I don’t know about you, but I’m going to search for a mindfulness app to install on my phone. It’s the missing piece to boost our motivation to exercise.

Quit the goals that don’t work for you

When is it okay to quit a goal? I’ve written a lot about setting and achieving goals. Fitness goals that can take you from winded walking down the street to running a 10K. Life goals that take you from a disorganized sad person to a Marie Kondo wannabe. But how about when you want to quit a goal? When is that okay?

Look back and assess

At the beginning of a calendar quarter or year I like to look back and then forward and try to decide on the things I want to achieve in the next few weeks or months. Those goals can be big ones, or little, some of each. When I achieve those goals, they should bring some kind of happiness and fulfillment to my life. 

If trying to achieve a full Side Plank Star makes you frustrated, rethink that goal.

But what happens if you’ve been working toward a goal that you set and it’s just not happening. Every time you think about doing that work, you get sad or find something else to do. You’re thinking about just not following through on that one. You’re thinking that you’re ready to quit a goal.

If a goal isn’t working for you

But, is that so horrible? If you find that a goal is no longer important to you, or if you’re just frustrated, then it ‘s time to rethink that goal. Ryan, from Point to Point Strength and Performance says, “Although quitting is usually associated with failure and a lack of grit and perseverance, it isn’t always a bad thing.” 

Look back, then, and determine if you’re getting closer to that goal. If you are, you may want to push just a little more and then reassess at the end of the week or quarter. You could just be at what Seth Godin, marketing expert and entrepreneur, calls “the dip.” If you’re closer than you were before and you believe that the goal is worth pursuing, keep at it. Your resilience is growing regardless. And if it’s a fitness goal, you’re reaching for that ultimate goal of healthy aging.

Our lives may not align with the goal

But elements of our lives change. What we thought would be important to us may no longer be important. Or training for the race just leaves us drained and weak. Time to reassess or even toss that goal. If you’re constantly frustrated when you’re working toward a goal, it could be that the goal wasn’t formulated well. Reassess. And be honest with yourself. Redo the worksheet in your Get It Done Guide. There’s no shame when you quit a goal, but make sure that it no longer matters to you.

It’s okay when you don’t know something

How to push on with your push-ups when you don’t know how

Let’s say you’ve set a fitness goal – like doing 10 regular push-ups in 6 weeks, and you currently can do 6 from your knees. That’s a great goal. It’s specific and probably achievable. You’ve set your intermediate goals, scheduled your workouts and got started. (If you’ve got visions of where you want to be but no idea of how to get there, download the Get It Done Guide for tips on setting your own goals!) Week 2 you can do 20 push-ups from your knees but can’t seem to progress to even one on your toes. What’s going wrong? How do you know when to ask for help? And realize that it’s okay when you don’t know something?

No shame in asking for help

There’s no shame in looking for additional help. When a goal is meaningful to you and you think that you’ve set all your benchmarks in place, but you feel like you’re swimming in place, it may be time to look for help. You can have all the motivation in the world – you really want to be strong enough to do those push-ups, but if it’s not happening and you’re getting frustrated, it’s time to seek outside answers.

Different ways to figure things out

It’s important to know, too, that asking for help or seeking outside answers is beneficial as well. When you shift your mindset from, “I’ve got to get this done!” to “I have to figure out a way to get this done!” then the challenges you face become opportunities and not roadblocks. When you learn about new ways of doing things, you enhance your own evolution. Continuing to learn will increase your resilience, and improve your outlook. What you saw as a failure previously, you can now see as additional motivation.

Pros have help all the time

None of us knows everything about anything. It’s okay when you don’t know something. And asking for help is a sign of strength. You’re smart enough to recognize that you don’t know something and humble enough to find the answers to your problem. And every professional athlete has a coach, a trainer, and other professionals helping them on their journey.

Intermediate push-ups steps

But back to our push-ups. From my own research, I learned some great ways to progress from knees to toes. They include push-ups on one knee, one straight leg. Also, doing push-ups leaning against a wall helps develop the upper body strength we need. And the plank exercise – from either the forearms or hands also increases our upper body strength. Remember to keep your core tight – always! – and your back straight. Don’t try to bend your elbows too much, either, especially at first!