November 2024 - Fran's Fitness Over 50

Grateful for everything

Does anyone understand how time works? One minute I’m not making resolutions for the New Year, and the next we’re roasting the Thanksgiving turkey. How does that happen? Anyway. It’s that time of year when everyone shares with the people around the table what they’re grateful for. I’m grateful for everything.

Gratitude brings resilience

This year has been tough, but we’ve proven that we’re tougher. We’ve shown resilience in the face of numerous obstacles, and grown stronger as a result. We’ve shown the world that even when things don’t go our way, we can still hold our heads high and be grateful that we’ll have another opportunity to show our stuff. We can be grateful for everything we’ve got, even when that’s not much.

What I’m grateful for

My old dogs are still around. The 15-year-old wanders around and messes in the house more, but he’s still mostly healthy (knock on wood). Booker (pictured) is 12, and he’s very special too. I’m grateful for having the ability to move my body pretty much how I want when I want. I’m grateful to be able to get up from the floor. I’m also grateful for my senses. I can experience all the wonders around me.

What does being grateful for everything bring?

Okay. enough about me. Showing gratitude every day brings optimism and joy, essential for your healthy aging. And expressing it will make you feel even better. You would think that it would work the other way – that the person who you’re expressing gratitude to would feel the joy, but it’s you. When you express your thanks, you’re acknowledging that someone else thought about you. Someone wanted to make things a little easier for you. And knowing that will give you what I call the “warm fuzzies.” That feeling will last for far longer than the moment it takes you to express your gratitude.

You don’t have to express your thanks out loud. A note will work. And if it’s not a person you’re grateful to, writing in a Gratitude Journal works, too. It’s also a wonder to look back on and rediscover the feelings.

I have a lot of people to thank. I’ll get started now.

Time or Money: The price of a holiday

I’ve said “Everything in moderation” frequently. And it’s the watchword I live by. I never say “No” to dessert. If I want potatoes, I’ll plop a spoonful on my plate. Having lost a lot of weight years ago and kept it off, I always watch what I eat and try to eat a nutritious diet every day. Except for Thanksgiving. Thanksgiving is the one day all the eating rules fly out the window. Thanksgiving is the day when more is better. As long as it’s really good food. But, what’s the price of all that really good food? What is the price of a holiday?

What’s being counted?

The price depends on what we’re counting. If it’s calories, to me Thanksgiving is worth it. It’s the one day a year we celebrate what we have. If I want to celebrate with chocolate pecan pie, I’m making it! Or we could be counting the cost of the meal. Again, to me, Thanksgiving is not the day to be pinching pennies. And then time might be an issue. It takes a while to prepare all that yummy goodness. As my sister and I enjoy cooking together and don’t usually have other guests on Thanksgiving, we’re making the most of our time.

Time is more than the cost for some

But not everybody has the luxury of being with family and guests while cooking. It’s no fun being away in the kitchen while everyone else is sharing stories and experiences in another room. In fact, in an article I read, one dietitian opts for a store-bought Thanksgiving dinner instead of preparing it herself. This is despite the added calories, sugar and salt she knows the prepared dinner has.

But, are you concerned about eating healthy?

On yet another hand, if, for health reasons, the holiday is less important than sticking with your meal plan, then you may choose to forego the traditional dinner and choose a healthier option. There’s certainly nothing wrong with a delicious roasted chicken or turkey with fresh vegetables for side dishes rather than stuffing and mashed potatoes.

Thanksgiving is about trade-offs. What’s important to you may not be the thing that’s most important to someone else. I enjoy preparing the meal, perhaps it’s because I’m with the important people in my life. To others, the meal is less important than the company. So the food may not be as high in quality as it might be if it were home-made. But being with good company boosts our resilience.

So, prioritize the things that are important to you. Be with your friends and family. Be healthy. Or enjoy the process and then the meal itself. The price of a holiday is what you put on it, in the end.

When your state of mind makes it impossible to get stuff done

Some days, no matter what you do, you still feel like it’s impossible to get stuff done. I get it. You used to feel like you were invincible. And you felt like your resilience knew no bounds. But some days, when the world beats at you from every direction, you feel like you just want to curl into a little ball and hibernate for the foreseeable future. But even though it feels like it’s impossible, there’s still stuff that needs to get done.

So, how do you go about doing it?

When not even looking at your Get Stuff Done Funtime Menu helps you get past the whirlwind in your brain, how can you even start?

First, center yourself. If my brain is whirling when I have to get stuff done, I know it’s just a waste of time. I can’t help my brain from whirling, but I can shift gears and give it a mental shove to focus on something else. Psychologist Lauren Kerwin, PhD, recommends practicing mindfulness for one minute every day on each of your senses:

One minute on something you can see: your dog, a bird outside the window, the color of your floor tiles.
Something you can touch: a blanket, the water running through your fingers.
Then on something you can smell: tea, essential oil, laundry detergent on your shirt.
And something you can hear: the hum of the air conditioner, a car driving by.
Finally something you can taste: toothpaste, food you’re eating.

This practice grounds you in the physical world and helps your brain move past the tornado.

But how can you get stuff done even after you’re grounded?

Chances are, even after you’ve done the exercises to ground yourself, you’re still feeling pretty shaky. I know I feel vulnerable after this, and not ready to start to get stuff done. When you’re feeling less like there’s a tornado in your head, but it’s still impossible to get stuff done, how do you even start?

Just start

Do something. Take one step. Make it a small step. A very tiny step. And then another. Then another. The idea here is to reach a point where you can take action. Because starting small is still starting. If you can only do five minutes of work – whatever the work may be, it’s still five minutes you couldn’t have done before. It’s a start.

And tomorrow you can do more. You’ve proven your resilience before.

5 Ways to Create a Positive Mindset

It’s tough these days. The world seems to be getting smaller and more nervous all at the same time. With instant access to so many media sources, it’s easy to become overwhelmed. And this week has brought it all to the fore. My brain has been churning so much that I’ve had to completely check out a few times to not break down completely. And checking out – turning everything off – is one way to create a positive mindset (see below).

Why does a positive mindset matter? If you believe that things are dark, you’ll never see the light again, and you’ll never be able to do anything about it, then you won’t. You’ll be stuck in that dark place because you believe it. On the other hand, if you completely believe that something is possible, you’ll make it happen. An article in the Journal of Neurochemistry indicates that our brains adapt to changes in its environment. It’s not as simple as affirming that everything is okay, but our brains are quite malleable. And we can make that positive change happen. You’ll be happier, more productive and more resilient. Here are some ways to create a positive mindset and let ourselves get things done.

Stop doomscrolling

I found myself getting more and more depressed with each post I read the other day. I had to consciously turn my phone off to get out of that spiral. So, when things get to be too much, just turn your screens off. It can be for five minutes or five hours. Take the time you need.

Sleep

Make sure you get enough sleep. Being tired affects your mood, your productivity and your health. Stick to a consistent sleep routine. It helps.

Get one thing done

Set your priorities for the day, making sure that you choose a few intermediate steps toward your goals. You’ve developed these in the worksheet included in the Get It Done Guide. And get one thing done. Just one little thing checked off can really improve your mood. It’s so satisfying.

Exercise

I’ve said it before – those endorphins from intense exercise are real. I feel a bazillion times better after a workout. After a tough exercise session, I’m a much nicer person.

Meditate

It’s not woowoo. It really does help to center you and help your mind stop churning. A short guided meditation (download one for under a dollar here) can clear your brain and help you become more productive.

Use any or all of these techniques to create a positive mindset. They work for me.

Get Stuff Done Funtime Menu

One from Column A on your Get Stuff Done Funtime Menu to get your motivation going.

My sister and I are in the midst of switching our ecommerce platform and the stress from that, along with everything else, is taking its toll. Google has lost our online shop while we’re switching, so sales are nonexistent. Tango, my geriatric dog, hasn’t been well the last couple of days as I’m writing this. The tire pressure light in my car came on when I was on my way to a client. My motivation has fossilized. I can’t get anything done because I’m so stressed.

And then I remembered an article about the Dopamine Menu. Create a menu of courses of things that make you feel better. Do a little one – that’s the “choose one from Column A” like on a Chinese restaurant menu – and you’ll get the boost to get your motivation going. I like to call it my Get Stuff Done Funtime Menu. Weird name, right? But it perfectly describes what it’s used for. When your motivation has gone, pick up your Menu and choose something to just get something done.

There’s so much to do, but I don’t feel like doing anything. I’m scared to get it wrong. I’m scared to interfere with something that needs to happen on its own. My bank balance is diminishing. But life goes on. And I know that better days are on the horizon. I just have to get there. But how?

Enter the Get Stuff Done Funtime Menu. Because, no matter how much you want to get stuff done, if you’re paralyzed with fear, it’s not going to happen. Here’s how to unparalyze yourself.

Create your Menu

I encourage you to create your Get Stuff Done Funtime Menu when you’re not feeling stressed. You won’t be creative, you won’t think of a thing to put on your menu. So start this project when you’re calm and have about twenty minutes. Things to keep in mind: none of us has unlimited time. That’s why we create 3 columns. The Appetizer, The Main Dish, and Dessert. Yes, dessert. We deserve it. And when you don’t feel like doing anything, check your Get Stuff Done Funtime Menu – especially Dessert, knowing that if you’re serious and do Get Stuff Done, a reward awaits!

So get your completed worksheets from your Get It Done Guide and get to work. You’ve filled out a worksheet for each of your goals, and you’ll want to put items from all of your worksheets in your Menu.

The Appetizer

Each entry in your Appetizer column should take no more than 10 – 15 minutes to complete. Sorting the mail or cleaning out your sock drawer, as examples. Or for me, as an example from this morning, changing the code to the Packing Slip template on our new ecommerce platform. This should be something that doesn’t take long but ticks one little thing off the list. Don’t have a list? Check your Get Stuff Done worksheet for a small Intermediate step toward one of your goals.

Your Main Dish

Go for a walk and get some fresh air when you're feeling paralyzed.

As the name implies, the Main Dish column on your Get Stuff Done Funtime Menu should be more meaty. It could take a few hours. Again, check your worksheet for a bigger Intermediate Step toward a Big Goal. So, in my example, setting up the Rewards application on our new ecommerce site could fit the bill as a Main Dish.

Or, if you know you need to exercise but really can’t face changing for a full exercise session, call a friend and go for a walk. The fresh air will revitalize you. You’ll be in a better frame of mind when you’re done too.

Dessert

The reward for a job well done! But be careful here – don’t blow the budget or the calorie reserve. Keep the size of the task in mind when you choose a dessert – they should be in line. And your Dessert can be used as incentive for actually getting stuff done!

And when you actually do accomplish something, your mindset will be more positive. That leads to more resilience. And you’ll be happier.