Tag: time management

Everyone has their own stuff

Everyone has their own stuff, so they don't care what I'm doing now.
Even if anyone is watching, they don’t care. Everyone has their own stuff

It doesn’t matter what anyone else is doing. Really. Everyone has their own stuff that they’re going through. And you probably don’t enter into the equation. As I’m writing this, today has been a frustrating day. Internet issues, financial institution frustrations, dog training problems. It seems like most things that can go wrong have. I work with my sister – our desks face each other. Our monitors are back to back. I’m having my issues and she’s having hers.

The important things get done

Sometimes I’m a little hesitant to work on certain things during the business day because they don’t contribute to our shared businesses. It doesn’t matter that I’ve done the tasks on those businesses that I’ve set out to do for the day, I’m still hesitant. Stupid, but there you are.

She knows, though. And, you know what? It doesn’t matter. There will always be more to do. Today? The crucial tasks are completed. Tomorrow is another day for the rest of the stuff.

She’s got her own stuff

My sister doesn’t care. She’s got her own stuff to deal with. 

And if I’m focused on what others are thinking about me, I’m not getting anything productive done. Nothing on that to-do list is getting checked off. That article is not getting written. The website changes I wanted to make are not getting done. I need to focus on what’s in front of me.

They don’t care

Just like exercising – if you’re at a gym, no one is watching you. Just about everyone feels self-conscious in their workout gear, even though some will never admit it. Everyone thinks that they look stupid doing some of the exercises. A while ago I wrote about this: “No one is watching” And it holds true for most areas of life.

People, unless they actively ask you to participate in it, are so busy with their own activities that they are not paying attention to others.

They don’t care what you’re doing. What video you’re watching. If you’re listening to a business podcast or a steamy romance audiobook. Unless they ask you a question and expect you to focus on them, they don’t care that much at the moment.

It’s natural that we care what others think

Of course, in the larger scheme of things, it’s totally natural that you care about what others think of you. People are social creatures. We want to be with others, and we want others to want to be with us. It follows that in order for others to want to be with us they care about us in some fashion, so we want others to think well of us. We want to do everything we can to foster our relationships and not alienate anyone.

But for the tiny minutiae of everyday life, no one cares that you’re watching a YouTube video and not doing a crossword puzzle. 

So stop wasting time. Get the important stuff (or the distasteful stuff) done first and then figure out what’s important to you. Decide on the steps you need to take to get there, and do it. If today the thing that’s important to you is regaining your focus, go exercise (because exercise really does increase focus), decide on a plan and get to work.

Set goals – big and little

Are you retired? Still working? Working on not working? Regardless – it’s important to set goals for yourself. The way we grow is to set goals and challenge ourselves, in whatever area we choose. And, don’t limit yourself to one area. If you’re still working, great! Set goals – big and little – for yourself professionally, but also personally. 

I work for myself in a number of enterprises. I set goals for the business and for myself. One goal is to create a course relating to self-discipline that my readers (you!) will find useful in your fitness journey. My sister tells me that I have more discipline than anyone else she knows, so hopefully that expertise will help others. I’m writing my modules and hope to have a course by the end of the summer.

Another of my personal goals is to complete 10 regular pushups (from my toes). Pushups from my knees are no problem. And incline pushups are easy as well. I’m at about 4 or 5 regular ones now, so I’ll keep working at it.

To grow means that there’s work involved. Many people think the word “work” has a negative connotation. Meaning that work is bad. I don’t see it that way. Work is serious, yes, because my goals are serious to me. It’s hard. And work is challenging. But it can be fun. And the results: downright delightful.

I have fun when I work. I try to have fun all the time. Just because I’m trying to accomplish something doesn’t mean that I can’t have fun with it. Fun makes the work easier.

Big goals

When you have a BIG GOAL, it can seem intimidating and not at all fun. The secret to achieving that BIG GOAL is to chop it into smaller, more manageable goals and incorporate some fun into it if possible. And big goals can seem crushingly hard, unless you’re committed to its success. I wrote about that just a couple of weeks ago.

For example, if, as my sister and I did, you had to move all of your grandmother’s things into your house and then, after living with the clutter for a couple of years, decide to declutter – that’s an impossible goal to manage all at once. So we thought about the best way to tackle the job and came up with the strategy of: one room at a time, in fifteen to twenty minute chunks.

We started with a corner of one room, set up our three stations: throw away (for things that we could not see anyone having a use for, ever), donate (for things that we couldn’t see ourselves using) and keep (for things we couldn’t bear to give up). We worked for fifteen minutes every day, and in a matter of months the job was complete.

A side note: don’t ever feel badly about keeping something when you’re trying to declutter. You’re entitled to your feelings. Think about the item. Will you be sorry if you never see it again? You can always get rid of something but you can’t get it back.

And the goal of losing weight. If you have more than 3 pounds to lose, that’s a BIG GOAL. It’s hard and needs to be addressed as a true achievement. Intermediate goals should be set and addressed.

Little goals

I practice my balance every day by standing on one foot for a minute while I brush my teeth. That’s a total of two minutes, which is how long we’re supposed to brush our teeth. My little goal is to not put a toe down before the time is up. My reward if I’m successful? Well, in this case, just the knowledge that I’m growing stronger and my balance is improving. I’ve been doing this long enough that the exercise is a habit.

But your little goals can range from substituting a piece of fruit for the candy you usually eat in the afternoon, to focusing on work for an extra five minutes. And then reward yourself with a big stretch or an extra round of Spider Solitaire.

My goal of 10 regular pushups is a medium-sized goal. It’s big enough that it needs to get chopped up and intermediate goals set, but not big enough that it will take months. And when I reach that goal? I’ll think of another.